Evie Lisk
In today’s society, it can be easy to have high expectations, especially when it comes to our relationships. Repeatedly exposed to Insta-perfect couples, we often find ourselves focusing on finding love and falling head over heels for someone, but what about the other relationships in our lives?
Does the overwhelming desire for romantic relationships put our friendships on the backseat? Are we too focused on the expectations of romance that we forget the crucial role platonic love plays in our lives?
What is the importance of friendship?
For me, the importance of friendship trumps all. That said, having never been in an actual relationship I don’t feel the need to yearn after what I’ve never had. And while I’d like to be in a real relationship one day, it’s not a priority for me right now. Instead, I crave raw, real friendships – if I have good friends in my life, I need not look any further.
“I know my friends will be there for me every step of the way.”
What got me through university was my friends. Their companionship means the world to me. They pushed me and inspired me. They knew me inside and out and when I was at breaking point they built me back up. I knew my friends would be there for me every step of the way. The reliability and trust that come with friendship are what makes them so important. Without my friends, I’d be lost.
i feel like i can confidently say there’s little in this world that’s more important than female friendships
— deal-za (@dijellz) October 6, 2023
However, even if you have amazing friends, wanting a romantic partner is sometimes inevitable. There’s no denying that the idea of someone to fall in love with, who understands you and listens to you without complaint, is attractive. With portrayals of romantic relationships seemingly everywhere – romcoms, couples’ TikToks, romance books, music – it’s easy to get swept up in the idea of finding that special someone who completes you.
While media and literature do tend to focus heavily on romantic tropes, there are equally important depictions of friendships in TV shows, movies, and books that underscore the value of platonic relationships.
The importance of friendship in fiction and media
Friends (TV series, 1994-2004)
As cliché as it is to pick the series Friends (1994-2004) to express the importance of friendship, I believe it epitomises what makes friendship so special. While the New York lifestyle might not be realistic for most, the friendships shown in Friends are ones you’re likely to see in your day-to-day life, or perhaps even ones you have yourself.
Every character in the series is willing to go to great lengths for one another. Take, for instance, the first episode where Monica offers Rachel a place to stay, even after years apart, simply because her friend was in need. This theme continues throughout the series, with each character stepping up to help their friends at different moments, be it in times of financial hardship, heartbreak, or even the arrival of a new baby. Friends depicts the trials and tribulations of adult life and how friendships are key in navigating it.
“It captures the genuine, sometimes messy, emotions experienced in genuine friendships”
Granted, the group have their ups and downs at times; we don’t agree with everything each character does, but that’s precisely what makes the show so relatable. It captures the genuine, sometimes messy, emotions experienced in genuine friendships.
A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara (Novel, 2015)
In Yanagihara’s heartbreaking read, we follow the experiences of four friends over several decades. The book follows career shifts, sexual awakenings, loss, and all the twists and turns life throws at us. While the novel is often described as one of the saddest books out there, it’s easy to overlook the profound love and happiness that these friends have for one another.
Yanagihara’s remarkable tale is a must-read if you’re looking to find a powerful, tear-jerking depiction of adult friendships.
Barbie (Movie, 2023)
Barbie has taken the media by storm over the past few months and has had an undeniable influence on girlhood and female friendships. The focus appears to have shifted from tearing each other down to collaborating and supporting one another – as if everybody’s coming together to form one big friendship.
Barbie has prompted us to consider whether having a romantic relationship is more important than having an empowering, fulfilling group of friends. As Mark Vernon lucidly puts it: “Love comes and goes, but friendship remains forever.”
https://www.tiktok.com/@paulas.fits/video/7259341743835925786?embed_source=121355059%2C121351166%2C121331973%2C120811592%2C120810756%3Bnull%3Bembed_name&refer=embed&referer_url=www.empowordjournalism.com%2F%3Fp%3D47379%26preview_id%3D47379%26preview_nonce%3De4ab900628%26_thumbnail_id%3D47586%26preview%3Dtrue&referer_video_id=7259341743835925786
Friends are there at the beginning, middle, and end of your life. Even if your circle of friends has evolved since your childhood, every single friendship you’ve encountered along the way has played an important role in your journey and contributed to your growth, whether you’re aware of it or not.
To me, what makes a friend so special is that even when we are on different paths, I know that they’ll be there for me in times of need. If your romantic relationship breaks down, friends will be there to help you through it. They challenge you to reach your full potential, motivating you to pursue your goals and see the very best within yourself.
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Featured image courtesy of Polina Tankilevitch on Pexels. No changes were made to this image. Image license found here.
