Father’s Day is an annual celebration of fatherhood and male parenting dating back to the Middle Ages. Its aim is to help children understand the importance of their fathers in their life, strengthen father-child relationships and, consequently, the emotional development of young children.
As Father’s Day 2021 approaches, I have taken time to reflect on whether we really need these public days as a modern celebration. Father’s Day was originally a Catholic celebration held on 19th March and now takes place on different dates around the globe. Like many things in our rapidly modernising society, the necessity of nationally dedicated days to honouring parents is becoming controversial. Some view Father’s Day and Mother’s Day as affectionate ways to appreciate parents, while others see them as unnecessary, believing that we should be showing our parents appreciation and affection daily.
People are beginning to question whether these days are materialistic battles over who can be the ‘best’ child to their parents. Do these days add unwarranted stress upon those who have lost parents or aren’t associated with them? Do we need a day in the calendar to appreciate our parents, or should we be showing them gratitude every day?
This Sunday, I’m sure our socials will be saturated with photos of fathers as their offspring tell the world how much they appreciate them. For weeks, shop shelves have been filled with dad-appropriate gifts and cards, while online ads pop up reminding us to select the ‘perfect’ Father’s Day gift.
It is nice to offer gifts and tokens of appreciation to your father on this day, but how sentimental is a pair of socks, bottle of beer, or a box of smellies? Unless backed by genuine feeling, these gifts are meaningless. It is no doubt easier to show affection by giving a gift rather than truly expressing emotions. Perhaps these days offer an opportunity to hide true affections behind material gifts? As a society, we have been taught that buying gifts for certain people on certain days of the year is necessary when, in fact, it can be more a financial burden than anything sentimental.
Additionally, eighty percent of people agreed that the celebration is fast becoming driven by economic factors and consumerism. I visited Tesco the day before Mother’s Day this year and observed the store assistants crazily restocking the flower stand as people stood around waiting to grab a bunch –– consumerism at its finest.
Many fathers said that they appreciate hand-made gifts over store-bought ones. Children often come home from school with some form of Father’s Day craft around this time of year, and with this comes a whole new issue regarding what pupils without present fathers do while their peers make their card with pride, addressing it to ‘Daddy’. It singles out fatherless children, which can be confusing and make them feel abnormal.
With these occasions becoming so ubiquitous, both online and in our physical world, I cannot imagine the pain felt by those who have lost parents. Constantly being confronted by the word ‘Dad’ or ‘Father’ while doing your food shop cannot be easy. Alternatively, it can be a tough day for fathers who are meant to be present with their children but are grieving their own father, bringing back uncalled for memories. Is it a well-meaning occasion with detrimental impacts?
That said, doing something on Father’s Day is undoubtedly better than doing nothing at all. Lives can get busy so having this dedicated day encourages people to take a step back to appreciate their parents, which sadly might not happen otherwise. Maybe that’s why these days remain crucial; they serve as reminders for both parents and children to take a break from hectic routines and spend a little time together if possible, or otherwise just take the opportunity to express gratitude and appreciation.
I believe that Father’s Day and Mother’s Day matter as long as they are used as an opportunity to genuinely bond with parents. Parents said they appreciate the celebration but would rather spend the day with their sons and daughters than be showered with gifts.
What do you think? What are your Father’s Day plans?
Eve Davies
Featured image courtesy of Tim Mossholder on Unsplash. No changes were made to this image. Image license found here.
evedaviess
Eve is 22 years old and lives in Swansea. She has recently graduated from Cardiff University with a BA in English Literature. Eve's main interest is in lifestyle writing, particularly health, food, and travel.