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How Everything We’re Told Shapes Us

Being a child means you have such a vivid and creative imagination. I remember as a child having no worries, cares or responsibilities. Not everyone’s childhood is like this, however for me I would do anything to be a kid again. However it’s interesting how things that we heard or were told have stayed with us and shaped us into who we are today. 

How many times have you been told you couldn’t do something? Or achieve something? Or maybe you were ‘too this’ or ‘not enough’ of that. We’ve all been there, whether it’s a dream we’ve been told was unachievable or a goal that we would never reach. As a child our imagination is so vast that any dream is possible. Children grow up thinking they could be an astronaut or a ballerina or even a cupcake. Now apart from wanting to be a cupcake the other aspirations are all achievable. The little boy or girl who wants to be an astronaut will probably be told that it will never happen or the child who wants to be a ballerina may be told they aren’t tall enough.

“Goals are unachievable for a reason, if they were easy then we wouldn’t have anything to aim for.”

Why is it that we tell children that they can’t or won’t do something. Goals are unachievable for a reason, if they were easy then we wouldn’t have anything to aim for. Throughout my life, not just my childhood I’ve been told that I wouldn’t be able to do certain things or achieve things.

When I was 10 I was told by a teacher that I would never get into a private school. Yet I did, and I didn’t just get into one private school I got into two.

When I was 16 I was told I wouldn’t get the grades to get into Sixth Form and that it wouldn’t be for me. Yet I did. Admittedly I was half a GCSE under the requirements, but I still got in and a year later I was awarded four prefecting roles, including being a Senior Prefect and House Captain, I won ‘Entrepreneur of the Year’ for Young Enterprise and I thrived.

When I left school and told people I hadn’t and wasn’t going to university, I was told that I wouldn’t be successful or get into the industry I wanted to if I didn’t have a degree. Now this one I’m still working on, but don’t get me wrong, my journey may be more difficult but I’m determined to prove people wrong.

It’s this determination that seems to spur people on to go on and achieve these things. However determination can come with insecurities. If you tell someone they won’t achieve something, they might believe you and from that very moment they immediately don’t feel like they are good enough. If you told a ballerina they aren’t tall enough or that someone doesn’t have an ‘ideal physique’ then they become insecure about it.

“Education is so powerful, a large portion of our life is spent at school. It’s a time to learn and grow as a person, not the opposite.”

I asked our contributors about their own experiences and it seems that the times when we’ve been put down is within the education system. Education is so powerful, a large portion of our life is spent at school. It’s a time to learn and grow as a person, not the opposite.

Don’t let anyone tell you that ‘anything less than an A grade’ is ‘a failure’ or to ‘not waste application spaces’ when applying to a Russell Group university. Don’t let people’s opinion on whether you are ‘bright enough’ or that your dream job is ‘unrealistic’ or that you should ‘choose something different’ get to you.

“You are worth more than someone’s opinion of you and that shouldn’t stop you from achieving anything that you want to do.”

We all have our own path and actually if everyone listened to those who continue to put us down we wouldn’t get anywhere or achieve anything. You are worth more than someone’s opinion of you and that shouldn’t stop you from achieving anything that you want to do.

Neve Gordon-Farleigh

Image courtesy of Katrina Wright on Unsplash. Image license found here. No changes were made to this image.

Neve is a 21 year old freelance journalist, and our Head Current Affairs and Instagram Editor for Empoword Journalism. She specialises in social media journalism and runs the Journo Resources Tik Tok page. You can find her on Twitter @Neve_GF.

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