Chloe Boden
As someone who grew up in a small town, dating apps always gave me a hefty amount of anxiety. Maintaining an on-off relationship with them throughout my twenties, I find them unnerving. You’re welcomed back by the same sea of familiar faces: the hopeless romantics, exes and childhood friends.
Sure, there are a few new profiles. But the rest remain the same, like Robert Downey Jr returning repeatedly to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. What if these apps designed to be connect people are secretly rooting for our failure?
The Design Changes On Dating Apps
Users have noticed subtle changes across dating platforms, which make it more difficult to find out who likes you.
A few years back, Tinder rolled out its ‘secret admirer’ feature. An instant win at first glance: a person chooses between four cards, revealing someone who likes you on the reverse.
But what about the other three guaranteed matches that disappear into the ether? Now, users wait for the next time they can choose another card, slowly unlocking potential partners who used to be available all the time.
Similarly, Hinge allows users to send one ‘free rose’ per week, for those of you unafraid to show your keenness. This makes it more tempting to return weekly for more.
People on TikTok have expressed their outrage about Hinge putting your most compatible dates in a ‘standout section’ where you can only respond with a rose. This compiles a flock of your most appealing suitors, bundled together, which has been coined = ‘rose jail’.
The Gambling Mentality
The design of many dating platforms draw inspiration from games, producing an addictive cue and reward process. Tinder’s deck of cards gets users shuffling randomly through the pack, which can lead to hours of swiping left and right. Many features also require a paid subscription, so dating becomes more like active gambling.
Jonathan Badeen, Co-Founder of Tinder, admits the swiping mechanism was based on classical conditioning. BF Skinner discovered this method of conditioning in the 1950s.
“While it is unlikely app creators want to make successful matches impossible, there’s definitely motivation to make it more difficult.”
Skinner placed pigeons in a box and put food behind a disc, which would only drop down if the pigeon tapped on it first. Over time, Skinner found pigeons tapped the disc more often when the food dropped randomly as opposed to every time. They had been conditioned to associate the behaviour with a reward.
We may not be swiping for pellets of food. But the idea of a potential date is enough to keep people sieving through the pile.
How Dating Apps Make Money
While it is unlikely app creators want to make successful matches impossible, there’s definitely motivation to make it more difficult. Most dating platforms offer premium experiences. Users pay to unlock instant matches, unlimited superlikes and access to standout profiles. This dating ‘class system’ also causes problems. Who are these ‘premium people’ app developers have decided can reign above the rest of us mere mortals?
Even without the primary audience’s revenue, many apps pepper the deck of profiles with advertisements. Last year, Hinge generated 396 million dollars in revenue. Out of its 28 million users, only 1.4 million paid for premium. Two years ago, Tinder reportedly made 1.65 billion dollars in advertising revenue alone.
Smarth Sharma, 27, who uses Hinge, Grindr and Bumble, says: “At the end of the day, dating apps are commercialised products that have been created with intention. It would be pointless for them if there were no long-term profits.
“I’ve been using dating apps for years. I’ll admit I’ve ghosted people or engaged for a few minutes and then closed the app and come back a few weeks later. Even if you’re dating someone, it’s a chance to peek at the possibilities of what’s still out there, what could be.”
Are These Platforms Designed To Fail?
Despite rising suspicion of apps being engineered to end relationships, success stories provide a beacon of hope for the virtual lonely-hearts club. Tinder has sponsored weddings of past users who struck gold with the app. Hinge the self-proclaimed app ‘designed to be deleted’ champions intimate connections as its primary goal. It also helps shyer users with prompt questions, which make the first message less daunting.
“It’s a quick way to gain followers for influencers”
Dani, 27, who met her partner of three years on Hinge, said: “I wouldn’t say dating apps are designed to fail. I know a lot of success stories about people meeting online and staying together. Some definitely have a worse reputation than others, where it’s common knowledge that it’s a place for hookups, but others you can definitely find things more serious.”
Get To Know Or Get A Follow?
Some people now use the repetitive nature of dating apps to their advantage.
Dean Williams, 31, explains people use dating apps as a way of self-promotion: “Dating apps often have the option to link your other social media accounts. People put in their bio that they don’t use this platform, and to follow them on Facebook or Instagram. It’s a quick way to gain followers for influencers. As somebody that isn’t in it for that, what is there for me?”
Tinder makes it clear that attempts to self-promote to gain followers, selling items or campaigning is strictly against their community guidelines. These are (supposedly) removed from the site.
Whether creators of dating apps truly want the system to fail is widely speculative. After all, if no one found virtual dating spaces useful, the word would soon get about.
But next time you’re trudging through the deck, hearts tab or list of love interests, find some sympathy for the regular faces. They may be serving life in rose jail or stuck as a forgotten admirer. RIP.
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Featured image courtesy of Nik on Unsplash. No changes made to image. Image licence found here.
