Marie Kouppi
Content Warning: This article contains details of grief and death.
While it can indeed be intense, mastering navigating grief in your ‘panic years’ is deeply personal. Feeling uncertain about the future after such a profound loss is natural during this transformative phase of existence.
Processing the Initial Shock
Initially, it’s hard to come to terms with what has happened. Accepting that life has changed forever feels like an enormous task. Questions about why this happened may weigh heavily on your mind, and a mix of emotions like anger, sadness, confusion, and disbelief can overwhelm you.
It’s important to allow yourself to feel these emotions and not rush through the healing process. Seeking support from loved ones or a therapist can provide a safe space to explore these feelings and find meaning amidst the pain.
Bereavement help and support like the National Bereavement Service and The Good Grief Trust can be helpful at the beginning of this long journey. People often forget that helplines and online communities can be useful in some situations, too; helplines from Marie Curie and Sue Ryder have reportedly been helpful.
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Anger and Frustration
On certain days, the world can feel overwhelming. Emotions may overpower your presence, and anger may be the first thing you experience solely because of the injustice of the circumstances.
I understand that injustice might not be the first word that comes to mind when thinking about grief. However, there are moments when the question of “Why not someone else?” creeps into our minds, triggering anger, even though we wouldn’t wish grief on anyone. Feeling frustrated and seeking meaning in such a painful experience is natural. However, finding meaning takes time and patience. Engaging in self-reflection and seeking out comforting activities can help.
Again, healing is a personal journey, and it’s okay to take the necessary time to navigate through these emotions and find your path towards acceptance and healing.
“Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness”
Coping and Seeking Control
Bargaining may become a way to cope as you try to regain control. You might find yourself replaying scenarios, wondering if things could have turned out differently. However, acknowledging that some things are beyond your control is crucial. Accepting the reality of the situation and focusing on moving forward can help in the healing process. Seek support, practice self-care, and be compassionate with yourself as you progress on this journey.
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Acceptance in Memories
Depression may set in as you are about to start navigating grief, casting a shadow over your days. Each moment may be filled with the ache of loss and memories of happier times. Yet, memories offer comfort and become guiding lights for the future. They remind you of the love and joy that was once shared. Honouring these memories and allowing them to guide you towards finding new meaning and purpose in life is important.
“Your journey is valid, your pain is real, and there’s strength within you waiting to be discovered”
Strength and Resilience
In the depths of grief, you discover strength you never knew you had. Each day becomes a testament to resilience, a silent promise to keep going despite the pain. Healing is a journey with no fixed destination. It’s about embracing all emotions and finding beauty in life’s imperfections.
While others may not comprehend the emotional wounds inflicted by loss, these scars endure as reminders of our ability to experience profound emotions and treasure fleeting moments. Healing is not about forgetting but integrating our loss into our lives and growing stronger and more compassionate towards ourselves and others.
Hope and Gratitude
As you navigate this journey, you realise that while the pain will never fully disappear, it becomes a part of who you are. It’s a companion, a witness to life’s ups and downs. Through all the darkest moments, a new day is always promised. Love transcends time and space, giving strength to endure. Embracing our loss helps us discover the power of resilience and find meaning in our pain.
If you’re struggling with navigating grief, know that you’re not alone. Your journey is valid, your pain is real, and there’s strength within you waiting to be discovered. Grief isn’t the end but a chapter in the story of life. It’s the ultimate reminder of human connection and the beauty of vulnerability.
If you are experiencing grief and would like some support, you can find a list of resources here.
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Featured image courtesy of Aubree Herrick on Unsplash. No changes were made to this image. Image license found here.